This blog has moved to:

A Modern Military Mother

Come and visit me there – it’s a bit less bonkers than this one.

Hagar thinks I am mental but I don’t care. I think Gordon Brown shafted the country on purpose because he’s Scottish and all Scots hate the English. He did it to assert the final revenge of the persecuted Scots by destroying the economy and then buggering off back to Kirkcaldy to sulk because he hadn’t quite finished annihilating the country and wasn’t allowed to complete his life’s work. This being: – To create the collapse of the governance of England, which is actually, Great Britain dominated by an English majority.

I first lived in Scotland when I was an innocent 18 year old English girl. Like a lamb to the slaughter I was. I didn’t even know that Scotland was a different country to England. I thought Scotland was part of England, which was part of the United Kingdom of Great Britain. Who knew? Who cared? I didn’t. At school we learnt about Gladstone, Disraeli, Ghandi, the French revolution – we weren’t taught about the English persecution of Scotland. Ok, so I admit I was a snipsy bit ignorant but I wasn’t educated to hate the Scottish. Unlike my Scottish peers who are educated at school to hate the English. The English men folk don’t head up to Scotland nowadays to penetrate their wee lassies and pollute the breeding, those days are long gone. Get over it!

In the pub at night I would have to listen to the Scots nipping my head about the Sassonac revolution. I was held personally responsible for the failure of the Jacobite rebellion. Half of the time, I would sit there and think ‘seriously, get over yourself, move on.’ I went there with an open mind and good faith but all the whinging was doing my head in.

In the end I married a Scotsman, but to be honest he has got over it and is actually proud to serve the Queen. He’s still Scottish but unlike his brother and his wife, he doesn’t spit on the English soil as he crosses the border. Back to my point – Gordon Brown knew what he was doing and he did it on purpose therefore in the words of Jilted John:

“But I know he’s a moron, Gordon is a moron
Gordon is a moron, Gordon is a moron “

I know it’s childish but I feel better just putting it out there!

PS: Just on aside, while I am on the outrage bus -

1.) You have to pay to enter Wales via the Severn Bridge

2.) You are in fact paying the French to enter Wales as they own it

now that is something to whinge about in the pub!

I feel sorry for Fergie. Clearly, she is short of cash, desperate and I get it. This is just typical of the Royal family casting aside their children’s mistakes and not looking after them properly. It’s their fault that she is resorting to selling her contacts. If they gave her decent alimony she wouldn’t be making these f*ck ups. Let’s face it they can afford it. They are just being tight and mean to her because she’s ginger and a bit of a reckless pikey by their standards.

Prince Andrew married her. He had children by her. He lives off the taxpayers purse and he should make sure that she has enough wonga paid out of his personal allowance so that she doesn’t have to resort to this kind of shenanigans to get some moola.

Look, clearly she is bonkers but she has tried to create a career writing children’s books, working for Weightwatchers, helping fat people in Hull get thinner – it’s not like she isn’t trying (ahem yes very!). My point is this – the Royal family need to look after the little messes they create by their marriages and breeding. Otherwise Fergie is going to go all Dianagate all over again and nobody wishes that on the ginger goofball. Poor Fergie. Cut the poor mama some slack.

Don’t let the Government put the price of fuel up. The cost of living is directly linked to the price of fuel. If the price of fuel goes up then the price of everything in the shops goes up. We are going to be carrying the burden of debt for decades. I think that the Government should keep the price of petrol low and tax lard and salt in food products. Keep healthy food cheaper and junk food at a premium. Tax junk food and keep petrol capped.

I can’t believe I am advocating a crisps tax because I am passionate about salt and vinegar crisps but for the sake of the cost of living I am willing to eat carrots. It’s time to stop frying and start boiling.

Beautiful French Villa – click on this link for more pics.

Due to an 11th hour cancellation, we have availability at our lovely French villa for the half term week for the bargain price of €450 for the week. For some volcano friendly travel, it’s 5 hours drive from Caen, if you get the ferry from Portsmouth and about 7 hours from Calais. Alternatively, risk the ash and it’s 15 minutes from Limoges airport with flights from Ryanair and Flybe.

With 4 double bedrooms it’s the perfect holiday for two families – only €225 per family. Not to mention the acre if private gardens, children’s play area and ping pong in the barn.

The property is situated 3 miles from the bustling town of St Junien, a small rural French town that has 2 hypermarkets, a few mini supermarkets, restaurants, a Saturday market and the usual pattiserie, boulangerie, boucherie and other traditional artisan retails outlets. The property is located within an acre of grounds, with a secluded south facing private pool and loungers in the front of the house. There is a barn to the rear and inside the barn there is table tennis and a basketball hoop. To one side of the barn there is children’s play area with swings and climbing apparatus. The garden is fully fenced and safe for children, the swimming pool is surrounded by French law compliant safety fencing and a self closing gate. There is also a covered outside kitchen/BBQ area and an additional 8 seat table under cover by the kitchen door. All in all, a wonderful place to relax and enjoy fine food and wine.

To book, please email me at:

mail@lepetitpre.me

But I know ‘beautiful people’ who are ugly on the inside, I know ‘ugly people’ who are beautiful on the inside and I know those who are gifted with beauty on the inside and out.

Vegimitevix wrote something beautiful today and I was moved by her words.

I love being around beautiful people but my kind of beautiful people are creative, energetic, inspiring and giving. They inject colour and passion into the world. They twinkle and sparkle with optimism and positivity. They trip, stumble, fall down, brush themselves and get up again. Those are the beautiful people that I am attracted too and that is the kind of beautiful I would love to be.

Most of the time I don’t feel mainstream beautiful. I feel old, fat, decaying, hairy and wobbly with grey bits and oak ageing. But I can be bouncy and Tigger-like and I know many beautiful, bouncy, liquorice allsorts of people who are my kind of beautiful. I think it’s why I have decided to start a business networking community called ‘Divas in Business’.

Divas in Business will be a networking community targeted at women but not necessarily exclusively for women. It is for dynamic people with energy and creativity that want to get together, share ideas and connect. Successful business is about having a network of people with a wide range of skills that can be tapped into when opportunities, or needs, arise.

I am looking for founding Divas to help me get the ball rolling. I want the foundation of the community to be founded on the notion of networking. If you are interested on jumping on the ‘Divas in Business’ party bus then write on the wall of the facebook page. All founding Divas can create their own Diva title. I have decided on mine ‘Intergalatic Prima Diva’ – just camp enough. I am a IPD of one at the moment but together I think we can sprinkle some sparkle onto the business network community. What say you?

Join us on Facebook and let me know if you would like to be a founding Diva

I would be happy with Parliamentary Reform as long as we keep Trident. The reason I think we should keep Trident is simple.On the Global Stage if you don’t have Trident then you can’t come to the party. UK plc has some of the best soldiers in the world, with the keenest minds. If there is one party that UK plc should always be invited to it’s this one because it’s our thing, like Sunderland counting votes the fastest is their thing. Also Trident is like owning Mayfair on the monopoly board. You need to have it to do any kind of serious business.

Maybe the rest of the nation is ready to accept our demise as a nation but I still have hope. I am not ready to give Trident up yet. I think we should fight for the economy first, before we return to a peasant state, owned by the Chinese and operating as one big tourist attraction for rich Asians.

A hung parliament is an executed Great Britain. Don’t hang the country.

If ever there was a time for decision it is now!! If you can’t bring yourself to vote blue or red then vote for the I like pink wellies party – do it for those who died to give you the vote but whatever you do – DON’T SPLIT THE VOTE!!!!!!!!

I am about to embark on a mini adventure. I am cutting loose for three days. I am popping back to Yorkshire, the motherland and the heading over to Cumbria. I am going sans famille – no husband, no children. Just me, my Mini Cooper, and the Moulin Rouge soundtrack.

I can’t wait to cut loose. Throw away the shackles of wifedom and motherdom. I can’t wait to roam. I am taking a snack free handbag. I am not packing a wipe. I am loading up my overnight bags for three days, and I will return to being solely responsible for myself.

I can smell the freedom. I can’t wait. I am off to pack now and then I am going to get back on the road and roam again, even if it’s only for a brief encounter, I am going to savour every delicious second. How I miss my freedom, as much as I love my husband and children, I am traveler at heart and some days I feel like a caged bird. To stretch my wings again, for three days of liberation and soar – blissful.

Have a fabulous bank holiday weekend – what are your plans? I can’t wait to get back and hear all about. Ta Ta For Now.

“I think your pitch was really great and the stories luridly fascinating, but
the bottom line is I don’t think it has an audience. As a feature article
both men and women would give it 5 mins and love it. But as a book it has to
be primarily for either men or women and I think it falls down between the
two. It is about the lives of the ultra rich but it is quite dark and
misogynistic. We recently came a cropper with a similar book called Divorce
Confidential which was a brilliant read, but was not finally for men or
women.”

Divorce Confidential – Amazon link

I would like to understand this better. If books are for men or women – what ingredients do I need to make the book appeal to both? Or is it simply not possible?

It would be great if  you would be willing to read the book and then feedback, via the comments, why you think this book hasn’t been a success. Apparently, it’s a great read. I am going to get a copy too.

I would welcome your help in this matter. Of course, if you can’t be arsed then that’s fine too.